Behavior with others

1. The faqir must respect and protect the reputation of his brothers, whether they are present or absent, he must not slander or belittle anyone, it is said in the Holy Quran, to slander is like eating the pulpit of his dead brother.

2. The faqir is to give guidance by teaching the ignorant and guiding the misguided to make the weaker stronger. However, there are certain conditions in the act of giving advice that must be observed. They are of the order of three for the adviser and three for the adviser: for the adviser

  • advice must be given in secret (discretion)
  • advice must be given gently (lotf)
  • advice must be given without a spirit of superiority (haughty attitude).

For the one who receives the advice

  • he must accept the advice
  • he must thank the counselor
  • he must apply the advice.

3. You have to be modest with the foqara, be fair with them, be at their service according to your possibilities and means. A hadith teaches us: "The best of men is he who is at their service.

4. To have a good opinion of them, a positive opinion, not to dwell on their faults, and to rely on God Most High for them.

5. Accept their apologies when this happens.

6. Play good offices among themselves in the event of conflicts or misunderstandings.

7. Defend them in case of need, or if their honor is violated.

8. Do not ask to be their leader or moqaddem, for he who asks for responsibilities must be deprived of them as our prophet taught us - peace and salvation be upon him.

These are just a few examples of the rules of decorum which the traveling disciple must observe and adhere to scrupulously. But the Way is entirely Good Manners, as a Sufi of ancient times so aptly remarked: “make your deeds salt and your good manners flour.” By that he meant that the disciple should to be like bread that nourishes, invigorates and structures.

Abu Hafs Nissabouri said: “Sufism is entirely A’dab, at every moment there is an A’dab, in each state there is an A’dab, at each Station there is an A’dab; he who sticks to good manners, he will reach the level of True Men. He who is deprived of good manners is very far away when he thinks he is near, he is fired when he thinks he is accepted ".

In conclusion, we can say that good manners are innumerable, whether with the sheikh or the foqara and, perhaps even with the whole of creation, as many Sufis have said before us such as Ibn Arabi, Ibn 'Ajiba, Suhrawardi, Haitimi, and many others… Faith requires chariâa, he who has no chariâa has no faith and no oneness; the shariâa requires good manners, one who does not have good manners has neither a chariâa nor tawhid.

Abu Al ‘Abbas Ibn‘ Ataa was asked: "What is good manners in their essence? "He replied" whether one sticks to what is best, whether one has good manners with God Most High outwardly or in secret; if you behave like this then you are well educated whatever the horizon where you come from ”(reference made to the hadith which says:“ no difference between an Arab and a non-Arab, except by piety –Taqwa-). He then recited these verses:

"When you speak, it comes with sweetness, And when you are silent, it comes with beauty. "

The Sufis have rules of decorum in all things, during their travels, their different moments, their acts of devotion, their manners; when they are active or at rest. They recognize each other by their own good manners.


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